My pen yelled at me last night. 'Bloody murder!" it screamed.
Not sure you've heard a pen scream before, but if you have, you know that it's not as much fun as juggling burning coals. Dark inky blotches of anger somehow always find there way onto anything white, valuable, or dry-cleanable only. Imagine your freshly peanut buttered toast landing right side up. That's a hard thing to imagine because it doesn't happen. Imagine your friends camera only taking really great photos of you at last nights little shin-digg. Again, it doesn't happen. Try and strentch your mind to believe that, while traveling, everytime your significant other needs a 'rest stop' a rest area with free coffee appears. It doesn't, in fact, you probably just passed one. There are certain laws that can not be broken; ink screaming at clothing is one of them.
Can you imagine if God was a women?
"Ok, thanks for sending me to hell...but why would you do that?"
"Well if you don't know I guess you'll have the rest of eternity to figure it out!"
Like as if us guys needed anymore confusion! Seriously. If we could just find a loop hole in all of these laws of absurdity the human race would be so much better off. For now, I will try and put my pen back together.
2 comments:
What if we did live in a world with no "absurdity"; peanut butter up, lemonade stand in the desert, built-in-umbrella for the flash rain storm type world. What would be the purpose, existance w/o challenge is about as fun as playing video games where you can't die, like playing soccer against a team w/ no legs. I think I'll lay down and die instead. But most days I will the opposite. Weird?!
lol...
hmmmmmmmmmmmm........
i really like your way of thinking.
you may or may not like the comparrison... but this reminds me a lot of Anne Lamott's writtings.
talk to pomo dehoog about his theories on randomness.... i think they relate to the concept of absurdity...
(insert something profound here.)
later.
jef.
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